Weekend Reflections
It's early in the morning (at least for me). I got up a little bit earlier to take the dog for a walk, finish some laundry and then at 10 am I'm supposed to call my parents in Sweden.
I had a really good weekend for the most part. I did work quite a lot, but also had a lot of fun times. If anyone couldn't tell, I had a really good time at the Battle of the Bands show. It's strange but it was really satisfying to have some good friends win something like that. I have a horrible history of losing competitions, losing sporting events, etc. Heck, Friday night I even lost a poker (after a couple strong months, I've been falling into a losing streak). I know I had nothing to do with the Breaks win, but I'm just happy that I didn't jinx it for them by being there. I can't tell you how many shows I've been involved in where myself or my friends lost. I'm going to bask in the reflected glory of Ewan, Ryan and Sam. "Reflected glory!"
I also really loved the energy that comes with a rock show. I love the way the people in the crowd get all worked up and excited. I can't imagine what it would be like to be the performers. I know Ewan and the guys seemed to be really in their element and confident. I admire that.
But I also realized that I'm not cool. And I don't mean it in a really derogatory way, but rather that as much as I might want to be, I'm not a rock and roll star. I can't dance and I don't have a way with the ladies. These are things that I need to come to terms with.
"William Miller: Well, it was fun.
Lester Bangs: Because they make you feel cool, and hey, I met you. You are not cool."
Almost Famous
8 Comments:
oh, what is cool? Frankly, guys who have "a way with the ladies" are often vaguely creepy (even that turn of phrase is creepy . . . ), and beyond that, no one ever knows if they're actually interested or if they're players; I've watched my friends get screwed over by guys like that, and really, the fact that you're not like that is a good thing in the minds of most girls. As to dancing: it doesn't matter if you can as long as you try. I firmly believe this is the case with guys. So few of you try . . .
Swambo and I were talking about coolness and geekiness a while ago, and we came to the conclusion that people who are called dorks or geeks are people who care about things, be it music or movies or Star Trek or Batman. What makes someone "cool" is a nonchalance that often means he or she doesn't really give a shit. What kind of attitude is that? Embrace the dork, Anders. The dork is good.
Okay, I know I already posted, but I'm getting incensed. Excuse me, guy, but "rock star" is not limited to people who have lots of groupies and act nonchalant and dance well. I have proclaimed myself a rock star for getting a 92 on an English paper and for finding a bossa nova version of "Night and Day"! That's not "cool." But it is rock star. You know why? Because it's achieving something that you care about; it's not caring what other people think about you. That's what being a rock star is in my vocabulary. The fact that you freak out when people say Batman sucks or that the new Star Wars franchise is bad is awesome. It's what makes you rock star. Don't let anyone say you're not, Anders, and don't believe it yourself, because you are.
I just thought I would clarify that when I say "a way withe ladies" I don't mean being all player-like or anything creepy. All I'd like is the ability to talk to girls I meet at public places without coming across like a fool who keeps tripping over his own tongue because he can't talk. Or even being able to come across as somewhat desirable.
That's all. "Nothing funny."
Ahh the old "I don't feel cool/can't talk to the ladies" problem. Well in those regards I share your fear and insecurites. HOwever let me offer some advice, Advie that comes from...Star wars! "Fear, anger,agression, those lead to the dark side...You will know when your mind is calm relaxed.." it went somthing like that. anyway the point is, you come across more confident than you think you do. If you get into a situation (like talking to the ladies) where you don't feel confident, clear your mind and remember a Jedi's strength Flows from the force..
HAHAHAH oh man I just have to laugh at myself. As geeky as that may sounds I think you get what i'm saying. As Joseph Campbell teaches us, Myth tells us so much about how society and how to behave, so why not draw more common life lessons from starwars.
I agree with Ewan...I mean look at the Potions Master...he is completely socially inept...and a total bastard...but he is intelligent, witty...and underneath his un-cool exterior..(believe me he does not have a way with people-let alone the ladies)...he does care for people...in fact so much so that I married the guy...and i mean...c'mon he lives in a dungeon and used to be a deatheater-thats hardly cool!....I could have went with Sirius or Lockhart...they both have a way with the ladies,, and they were both 'cool'...but in the end they both prove themselves to be either bastards or reckless eejits...
anyways...im ending this now...
He cares for people in the sense that he looks out for their well being...not in a weird sentimental way...more in a you need to search for it...he isnt obvious about it sort of way...
holy crap im shutting up...
Thanks all. I think I understand what you're all saying. Sometimes it's easy to overlook things or place importance on the wrong things.
OH, and Luke I will remember to heed the Jedi Master next time it comes up.
Anders: unless a girl is a bitch, she's not going to care if you trip over yourself, and if she's a bitch, you should probably stay away from her anyway. Whatever girl you supposedly made an ass of yourself in front of on Saturday was probably just flattered that you were trying to talk to her at all, and even if you said something really stupid she probably thought it was cute.
I think guys have this impression that girls have a vested interest in making them feel like shit, so they're scared to say anything to them. My next column is so going to be about this . . .
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